Update:
Things have been going pretty well in my world.
I have been in recent contact with God himself, but that is for another time.
I have had a sudden inspiration spurt that is making me want to make stuff again, such as videos and blog posts. So here I am, making a blog post!
I guess you could consider this a return after a break, stuff is yet to come. I have the idea down for the second series which will be about my concerns for love. Maybe a bit of distance about it too. We will see what happens.
It does feel good to be back though! Having an outlet to just talk about stuff and release what I've been working on.
Also, I got a custom domain name! Yay!! I had to pay for a premium plan but that means I can do a lot more with this site now.
I'm glad you are reading this and I hope you have a good night (or day)!
(❤❤ ogredale x Outflown ❤❤)
Certain Stuff:
Things have been changing in my world recently, such as getting more days at my work and even getting a boyfriend. This is good and all but I am feeling a bit strange. Not knowing where I am has become more of an issue, but I recently haven't been anywhere so it really doesn't matter. It has been happening in video games but that is about it.
I am a big fan of Terry A. Davis and his work on TempleOS, it is all really interesting stuff and has made me learn a lot about schizophrenia and even myself. Why am I bringing this up? Because I like what he said at one point "There is just something not right about my reality". I've been feeling this a lot more recently as things change, just the feeling of something being off but you don't know what. Another quote I like is "I must be in a prison or something with a fake internet". I can also relate to this, feeling stuck or in the same place all the time. I think he is referring to the publicity of his work as it was meant to be God's Third Temple. He wants people to use it to talk to God and make offerings but no one really used it for that. In a sort of way, this is a prison as he cannot escape the infamy he has gained. He wants the attention of real Christians wanting to speak with God and make offerings, but he attracted the wrong crowd, which made fun of him and laughed. Just my interpretation of all that.
I have become a lot more aware of my current state as well as losing it. I have taped into the Global Consciousness more and am learning lots of things. I am becoming more aware of other people's beliefs and even speaking to God. I see this as a good thing.
I came up with a theory of why I am this way now. When I was doing middle school I was going to a physical school and interacting with real people face to face. After a bit I started having medical issues and mental problems. Ultimately this forced me to start online school so I could continue schooling. After a while of sitting in my room alone reading and taking quizzes, the link with my friends became very thin and I lost some of them. My level of social interaction went very low and my physical activity too. The world that I had built my whole life was taken from me by this stupid illness. I was stuck in a room now with only myself and a computer, so what do I do? I branch out on the internet and make friends there. This was great, I made long-distance friends, formed relationships, and talked to people again. I became a recluse with my computer. This forced me to drop the idea I had of a world and form a new one. This newly formed world was very crooked and twisted though, I got very angry at the world and the people in it. This made me want to do very bad things to others and the world, but eventually, I saw the light and got away from that mess. I re-thought my entire ideology and how I thought of the world, forming a more positive light. Even though my world was a lot better, my mind was still poisoned and still is to this day. What I am trying to say is that I had something, then lost it, but then regained a new something. This new something went through a lot of changes though and I am where I am now, still lost. I am a stitch in the fabric of time and it is very strange to acknowledge that fact. I really am a real person, just another human.
Those are just theories of why I am what I am today, some true some not so much. As some would say "But we wouldn't have it any other way". My world may be confusing, but there are infinite possibilities. This world is very interesting and new. I like it.